The Monday Stickler
Groundhog Hibs, Manchester United Comedy Troupe and a record breaker breaks his record again
Good Monday to you.
After a month of tinkering with selection and formation I think today’s edition of The Stickler is the closest yet to how I want it to look and feel. I’m not quite there timings wise yet as I’d like to get this newsletter into your inboxes on a Monday morning. It takes a very long time to put something like today’s issue together. I’m not done experimenting yet.
I’m putting everything into making this project work. If you like what you’ve seen in the first month please consider becoming a paid subscriber for less than the price of a pint a month. Thank you.
Before we get into the meat of the newsletter, some breaking news as I pull this edition together was the passing of Sven-Goran Eriksson, the former England manager. I don’t think he was that popular as England boss but he has the reputation as a thoroughly decent bloke.
Groundhog Hibs
I was at Easter Road on Saturday to watch Hibs v Dundee. I’d asked the question pre match if Dundee were really that good and were Hibs really that bad? The answer was neither. It was as intriguing as expected and can be comfortably filed in the “one for the neutral” category.
It doesn’t seem to matter who is in charge of Hibs and who the personnel are they are something of a soft touch who cannot do the basics well. Their recruitment is steeped in mediocrity yet those same people will be tasked with signing players to get them out of the mess they’ve created for this with the addition of Malky Mackay as the overseer of the football department. Depending on what you think of Malky will make that a good thing or a bad thing. There’s something culturally not right at that club though. Promoting the new manager from within is a mistake as far as I’m concerned. So it was no surprise at all that yet again Hibs gifted their opponent an early goal through shite defending as a unit.
Dundee were a bit unfortunate not to add a second with a goal rightly ruled out for an unlucky offside and you really feared for Hibs at that point. But it felt like Dundee took their foot off the gas a little and allowed Hibs into it and they gave a good few free kicks away just outside the box. Eventually they paid the price for that as The Stookie took advantage of a parting wall to rifle home the equaliser on the stroke of half time. Boyle is right out of form so maybe this goal gives him a boost but I honestly think his arm cast is cursed.
I had a half time Scotch pie which was pretty decent. Devin (my youngest daughter) had some really rank looking chips.
Into the second half and Hibs had the best of it without really threatening with Dundee content to let them have the ball and hit on the break when Hibs misplaced a pass. A sound tactic.
I was surprised Kieron Bowie didn’t get a start up front for Hibs, coming on as a second half sub instead. He really puts himself about physically and in a dramatic turn of events shrugged off two Dundee defenders to slot home his first goal for the Leith team.
What happens next will be no surprise to any Hibs fan. As serial bedwetters when they have the lead they retreated and retreated. Gray subbed off Striker99 for an extra defender in Rocky Bushiri. You could feel the panic on the pitch and in the stands. In the 88th minute the Flying Wotsit got in behind a dozy O’Hora to slip one in the pokey and have the Dundee support dancing on the pitch.
In injury time Hibs almost snatched a winner with Josh Campbell hitting the bar while Dundee continued to threaten at the other end. Little Colin Steven blew his whistle and that was that. Great entertainment, draw about right.
Elsewhere across the Premiership….
Rangers of Hampden absolutely scudded Ross County six nowt. County were atrocious but I’m sure this was a confidence booster for the Teddy Bears ahead of the upcoming Glasgow Derby. Cyriel Dessers was on the scoresheet again. Okay if you play for Rangers you’re going to get a lot of chances and Dessers makes an arse of a lot of them but he’s still finding the net. He also has the most sparkly eyes on a footballer. You could go swimming in those peepers.
Dundee Utd continued their unbeaten league start with a win over St Johnstone to add to their two previous draws. Perth Saints keeper Josh Rae didn’t have a great day. He powder puffed a shot stop at the first goal and for the second he punched the ball straight onto his teammates head. There was another wee incident in this game which we’ll come to later.
Due to Euro hangover time we had the second half of the card on Sunday. First up was last season’s Celtic at St Mirren. The Paisley Saints are still steaming from their Euro trip and promptly conceded in minutes to a CalMac ripsnorter. Like most games Sky Sports cover in Scotland that was game over already and unless you’re a Celtic fan you stopped watching. According to official reports it finished 3-0.
In the North, about four days travel from Kilmarnock, Aberdeen hosted Derek McInnes weary army. The Jimmy Thelin bandwagon rolled on with a 2-0 win to make it 8 wins on the bounce for the Dandies thanks to two headed goals from Pape Gueye. Honestly if Pape had heads for feet he’d be unstoppable.
The final game saw hosts Motherwell dismantle desperate Hearts. The Jambos had the Euro hangover card ready to play but maybe their problems run a bit deeper than that. It feels like there’s a fair bit of unease with Naismith’s tinkering and the reliance on the goals of Shankland last year cannot be a given for this season.
The highlights from the Premier League
I watched a lot more EPL action than anticipated this weekend, getting drawn into games when I least expected it.
In the Saturday lunchtime kick off the Manchester United Comedy Troupe were at their best. Somehow they turned a routine three on the keeper tap in into an offside from an inch out and then contrived to lose sight of any Brighton attacker in their box in the 96th minute to lose the game.
Both teams seem to be sending their Scottish players to Napoli (Gilmour and McTominay). Bonus for Brighton fans is that Handsome Matt O’Riley is on the way.
Brighton stuck three past Everton last week, Spurs stuck four past them this week. Dark Toffee days. Of course there’s nothing funnier in football than Jordan Pickford making an arse off it. I loved how he beat his heart after this to signal to his team mates that this was on him as if they were ever in any doubt.
On Sunday I caught the end of Bournemouth v Newcastle and Joelinton caught the end of Neto’s neck and somehow only got a yellow card for it.
Football Hero of the week
Oh snap Erling Haaland is back scoring hat trick’s for fun. Run for the hills.
Football Villain of the week
St Johnstone’s Adama Sidibeh was a wee bit unfortunate to get a second yellow for a nothing challenge against Dundee United. To follow that up with an enthusiastic rearrangement of Kevin Holt’s testicles was unwarranted. That’s two reds for Adama and a lengthy ban I’d suspect.
Ten things I think I think
One of my favourite sports writers Peter King retired from covering the NFL after this year’s SuperBowl. I’d been reading his column since the 90s and one of my favourite parts was always ten things I think I think. So here’s mine for this week:
